Lost in ....

I feel lost. Its simple. Nothing to it.  But life is going on. It has to. There is a house to buy. Miles and Miles away.  Children to take care of, to feed, to read, to love.  Our House is sold. I look around and I don't see things, I see my life in this house for last almost 4 years. I see my friends' smiles, drinks.. plenty of drinks on our bar on "Happy Hour" (more like hours and hours). I see girls in pretty dress drinking their tea. Boys running with bats and sticks. I feel the aches of all the soccer games against kids that made me feel like a kid again. I hear the trees move and my waking bird singing my tune. I feel the sun on face as I sit and sit on my private deck.. feeling lost.  If I only had one more day with my little guy... Just one day so that I can feel him kick and move and know that it will be ok.  It will be ok. For I have a great thing that may don't have.. I have HOPE . I feel lost but lost in aw as He loves me so , for He gave us HOPE, for He gave us LIFE once more!