Your duty is to sanctify yourself. Yes, even you. Who thinks that this task is only for priests and religious? To everyone, without exception, our Lord said: Be ye perfect, as my heavenly Father is perfect. St. Josemaria

Monday, July 13, 2009

Second Call within Marriage

In June, We went to the Catholic Family Expo. My husband heard a talk on "Embracing the Second Call within our Marriage" by Eulalio G. Gonzalez. We got the CD of it so that I could listen to it ! What an insight! Here are some notes that I hope it will inspire you !

He asked the question

" Why do good,faithful Catholics have significant, marital struggles, trials and sufferings?"

We live in a culture that does not support faithful, christian marriage. Marital struggles and challenges are part of our vocational journey. During the 1st Call , we are natural fervor, generosity, hearts filled with love and the demands of our vocation are not yet fully understood. In the Second Call, its later in time and maturity and after life has taught many lessons, begin to see vocation and life differently than at first, time of great challenges and trials, yet Christ meets us in a new way!

What is God doing in the Second Call--
See the example of Peter, his second call came after Christ left, not to be discouraged and It is a fresh call from the Lord.

What are some responds to the second call in marriages? ...

1. Rededicate yourself to the Lord, your spouse, and your vocation. (Renew your vows!). Fidelity involves growing together

2. Live more in the spirit, freeing our minds from human inessentials.

3.) Live in humility, foster healthy self-distrust

4.)Find out how to discover Jesus again. Its the central point in our vocation to serve the LORD.

5 Key Practical Steps.
1. Pray daily (no excuses) pray weekly with spouse
2. Frequent the sacraments, especially confession
3.Date regularly (1/week or 2/month)
4. Weekly Couple dialogue (no kids)
5. Find a mentor couple

Some Relationship Tips.
1. Ask forgiveness/give forgiveness
2. Express gratitude daily
3. Express your love/affection in words and actions daily
4. Praise spouse often
5.Show humility and respect in disagreements
6. Let go of need to be right or to win the argument
7. Let go of desire to change your spouse
Here we have what should the "Couple Dialogue Topics" should have:
1. Honor your spouse - praise your spouse for the admirable qualities that you have seen recently and for the way they love and serve the family. At least 3 ways.

2. Discuss your prayer life- talk about how the Lord is speaking to each of you.

3. Talk about your relationship - issues that need to be discussed or resolved between the two of you.

4. Ask each other: How can I pray for you? Let your spouse know your needs so they can keep them in prayer.

5. Discuss the children- how they are doing, any issues, etc.

6. Discuss your schedule/home life responsibilities- go over your upcoming schedule for the week, coordinate your calendars, discus home projects or other practical family life matters!

I sure hope this help or inspired you some what. It really did for me. I wish I could share with you the talk for its filled with so much wisdom!

God bless you and your marriage !

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